Hazrat Hakeemul Ummat Moulana Ashraf Ali Thanvi ra said:
Most of the people do not pay necessary attention required for the proper upbringing (tarbiyat) in childhood. They condone accurate training saying they are just kids.
However, this is the age for establishing permanent habits. The characteristics developed in this period last for ever. This is the time to correct the morals (Ikhlaq) and strengthen their thoughts (khayalat) (Islamically).
Hence, a child stays with his parents from birth and regards them his mother and father, respectively. Later in life even a lot of people were to raise suspicion about this, he will never doubt about them being his parents. The teachings of childhood are so solid that they do not wear away except when Allah SWT wants them to be erased.
Malfoozat-e-kamalat-e-Ashrafiya #637, pg 146
Raising Muslim children is very challenging and one of the most difficult responsibilities for the parents.
Following are some essential tips to help.
They have been gathered from saying of our pious elders (akabir):
1. Set an example/role model for them by doing your self-reformation (islah) with sincerity.
2. Make the environment of the home Islamic as much as possible.
3. Maintain exemplary relations with your spouse.
4. Give them the best of your attention, love, material resources, time and training. But set expected standards and implement them firmly.
5. Make a routine of reading regularly from the books of our mashaykh with them. Select simple books, like Bashiti zewar, Hayyutul Muslimeen, Asan nakiyan. Daily 2 -3 pages. At the most 10 to 15 minutes. This is the most stressed and most beneficial. Do not worry if they seem too young to understand. Develop a habit. InshaAllah, it will illuminate their heart and make it receptive of good later in life.
6. Remember making them truly religious is more important than making them hafiz and alim. A non-practicing hafiz/alim is worse than a practicing jahil.
7. Take them regularly to visit mashaykh and to get their dua.
8. Select a pious Sheikh/scholar who is steadfast in following Shariah & Sunnah in your locality and visit his lectures and discourses regularly.
9. Make dua for them a lot. For their efficient religious upbringing and also sufficient worldly progress. Mufti-e-Azam Pakistan Hazrat Mufti Mohammed Shafi’ ra has mentioned in Mariful Quran that the most successful means for the upbringing (tarbiyat) of children is parents’ dua.
And the success is from Allah SWT .