A seeker wrote,
When any opportunity of leading Salah (or any other opportunity which may put in prominence) comes up, I can almost “feel” my Nafs getting pleasure as if I’ve already taken that opportunity. But I make sure I run away from that opportunity, by either leaving that place, or distracting myself by doing some Zikr, or reading some book, or thinking about something. I conclude from these feelings that Hubb e jah has not left me, but Inshallah I’m trying to suppress it as much as I can.
Ashrafiya replied,
One has to differnetiate between the random thoughts (wasawes) and the real spiritual disease.
Wasawes are created by nafs and Shaitan to bother us and keep us occupied in them instead of the the real issues.
Whereas, the spiritual diseases are all ikhteyari. That is volitional, within your own control. You consciously decide to do this to get pleasure.
In my lowly opinion you are having wasawes. Just ignore them and keep yourself busy in what needs to be done.
Islahi emails:KN